Relationship Goals I learned from "Gossip Girl" - HelloGiggles
The problems that Chuck and Blair face in “Gossip Girl” are honest-to-God real issues. Blair Waldorf Quotes: 30 Words of Wisdom On Life and Love. It perfectly sums up how people settle for less in relationships. sonnets about being compatible, or novels about shared life goals and stimulating conversation. 25 Life-Changing Relationship Lessons We Learned From Chuck And Blair .. Chuck Blair, Leighton Meester, Blair Waldorf, Couple Goals, Moving Pictures.
Being overjoyed when they were finally together, and pinning after them when they were apart. At thirteen, my ideal boyfriend was the charming, well-dressed anti-hero with the perfect voice. My ideal boyfriend was Chuck Bass. And while my self-esteem was still low, I was a great distance away from my thirteen-year-old self.
Gossip Girl shifted to a guilty pleasure for me. The plot lines were ridiculous, everyone changed partners faster than a game of musical chairs, and no one in the cast could pass as a teenager. It was something that two English majors could watch for fun on an introvert weekend. Still, I would become enthralled whenever the episode would involve Chuck and Blair. Watching, with a certain amount of masochistic glee, as the couple fought and made up, ripping my bleeding heart out of my chest because I just wanted them to be happy.
They are two deeply flawed individuals who bring out the best and sometimes worse in each other. Blair, behind her tough perfectionist mask, is riddled with bone-deep insecurities. Chuck, behind his womanizing and party boy front, is a deeply broken person who just needs to be loved. Both their passion so strong, it must be expressed in extreme ways.
But it was a relationship I thought a lot about. Now I am twenty-three and nursing a relationship hangover that was nearly a year of hell. I thought it would be fun to watch my favorite guilty pleasure show, Gossip Girl, thinking it would be nice to watch my favorite fiction couple and prove to myself that love is truly not dead. In the decade between the first time I watched Gossip Girl and now, I learned that the story of Chuck and Blair is not one of love, but an example of a toxic relationship.
Psych Central gives a nice list of the warning signs of an emotionally abusive relationship.
Blair Waldorf Quotes: 30 Words of Wisdom On Life and Love
Out of the twenty-one signs listed, Chuck and Blair have done all of them to each other at one point. Humiliation, unreasonable jealousy, making everything your fault, and domination and control being the top ones on the long list. Domination and control is the core of Chuck and Blair relationship. These are two calculating, ambitious people who will do anything to succeed, in both life and in love.
Their relationship can be seen as one long chess game. Both are trying to pull a power move on the other in order for them to feel good about themselves or to keep the other person from leaving. Their relationship has two settings: Both are terrible mindsets to have when you are supposed to be a healthy relationship.
Chuck and Blair try to gain control of the relationship using a variety of different means: How messed up is that? While this makes for great TV, to live through this in real life would be detrimental to your mental health, as you are constantly navigating emotional landmines, wondering which little saying or action will cause the next blow up.
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But when fighting no longer becomes what you originally argued about, but who wins, no matter the cost, everything becomes a weapon to use.
Once your arguments become a competition, you no longer have a partner, you have a competitor. All of this is made worse when fighting and scheming is used as sexual gratification, as we often see in their dynamic: I was in a relationship where our only form of catharsis was throwing hand grenades via text message.
When Serena returns home from boarding school, Blair learns from Nate that he lost his virginity to a drunken Serena over a year ago. She then learns that the actual patient is Serena's younger brother, Eric, who had been committed after a suicide attempt. Afterward, a remorseful Blair reconciles with Serena. This leads to a heated affair and an eventual love triangle. Her inability to choose creates much of the first season's story line.
She also begins a brief power struggle with freshman Jenny Humphrey. After she unites with Chuck and Nate in order to save Serena from the scheming Georgina SparksChuck realizes that his feelings for Blair are real and suggests that they spend the summer together in Tuscany.
However, he is discouraged by his father at the last minute, and stands Blair up. During their interviews at Yale University, Blair and Serena apologize for their ill feelings and resume their friendship. He initially shuns her advances, but later turns to her for comfort.
In the season finale, it is discovered that Blair slept with Chuck's uncle Jack and that Chuck had slept with Vanessa Abrams. Chuck then departs for Europe. He later returns to New York and reconciles with Blair while declaring his love for her, and the two finally begin a committed relationship. She finds emotional support from her mother, as well as Chuck.
However, she and Chuck separate once again when Blair feels that he manipulated her while competing with his uncle Chuck made a deal with Jack that Blair could sleep with him and in exchange, Chuck gets his hotel back that Jack initially stole to 'destroy Chuck'.
She later transfers to Columbia University, and learns that an emotionally reformed Chuck was responsible for her enrollment. In the season finale, Chuck attempts to propose to Blair, but is interrupted by Dan, who reveals that Chuck had slept with Jenny. Two weeks later, Blair and Serena depart for Paris intending to spend the summer together. When the relationship interferes with their business interests, she and Chuck break up once more.
Chuck promises he'll wait for her, and both affirm their belief that their love will reunite them in the end. They also end up working together at W. Later, she and Dan spend the evening talking on their cell phones while watching Rosemary's Baby. Later, upon growing curious of their feelings for one another, Blair and Dan share a kiss before the mid-season hiatus.
Blair eventually decides that she wants to be with Chuck, but shuns him once again after he tries to humiliate Dan. During a private confrontation, a drunken Chuck punches a window after he finds out Prince Louis has proposed to Blair, which cuts Blair's face as it shatters.
Blair Waldorf - Wikipedia
Afterward, Blair chooses to accept a proposal from Louis. She is then abducted by an enemy of the Basses, Raina's father Russell Thorpe. Chuck later rescues Blair and apologizes for his violent actions.
Following a night out together, the two have sex before Chuck advises Blair to return to Louis, believing that she will be happier with him. However, the season ends with the revelation that Blair may be pregnant. But that doesn't mean that there won't be new roads to go down that might be different than what we initially anticipated. Rovzar further stated, "Since they live in a world where both only seem to have half a dozen real friends if thatis it so crazy they'd end up together?
Bricker stated that "[Dan and Blair], out of all the main characters, were the most well-suited for each other. In real life, they would've been 'endgame'. There's nobody for each other but them. According to producer Joshua Safran, the creators planned to revisit their relationship once the timing was right. Safran also stated that the outcome wasn't necessarily decided ahead of time.
And we're often surprised by where their journeys take them; they open new doors for us all the time," he said. They have a volatile relationship, they always have, but I do not believe—or I should say we do not believe—that it is abuse when it's the two of them.
Chuck does not try to hurt Blair. He punches the glass because he has rage, but he has never, and will never, hurt Blair. He knows it and she knows it, and I feel it's very important to know that she is not scared—if anything, she is scared for Chuck—and what he might do to himself, but she is never afraid of what he might do to her.
Leighton and I were very clear about that. In response to these comments, Carina MacKenzie of Zap2it stated, "We're left wondering if Safran missed the part where she went home bleeding because Chuck was using physical intimidation to release his own emotions. She noted Chuck's public humiliation of Blair, his attempt to pawn her during a business deal, and his use of physical intimidation.
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MacKenzie also called the show's explanation "disturbing, particularly given the young, female target demographic of Gossip Girl and The CW. It is later revealed that she is pregnant.
Though she insists that she is in love with Louis, Blair begins to seek Chuck out as the season progresses. The two eventually declare their love for each other prior to a car accident in her limousine while being chased by paparazzi. Though both recover, Blair suffers a miscarriage from the crash. After the crash Blair decides that she must commit herself to Louis, converting to Catholicism and cutting off any connection with Chuck.