We're as different as chalk and cheese and here's what our 20 years of marriage looks like
What is the meaning of 'chalk and cheese'? (M. Shafi Mohammed, Chennai) This is an expression that has been part of the English language. He's not entirely sure why they agreed to their arranged marriage, but Chalk and cheese have the surface colour common between them. Metaphorically speaking, I am the chalk and he is the cheese. . While some might see this as a red flag that the relationship is not 'equal', others might see it as a I read a quote earlier and it made me thinking of you.
In stark contrast, I am a realist. His dreams of saving the world are really quite enchanting, but at times, make me want to take a pan to his head! What can I say? Fiction is lost on me, it really is. All couples are different in one way or the other, but the troublesome differences are those that come in the form of conflicting wavelengths.
When there is a lack of mutual harmony, the relationship can become discordant, or worst still, stuck and unable to move forwards. Opposites can serve to bring out a new and improved side of each person. So what could be better than dating someone who, by default, thinks differently from you?
Furthermore, healthy debate and differing opinions can bring added spark to a relationship.30 PERFECT I Love You Quotes
Wait a minute…do you mean all these drawn-out disputes I keep having with my husband are actually enriching our relationship?
It involves acts like forgiveness and acceptance of ones mistakes. You fight, and you learn something new about the person. Everything has its place, and therefore, everything should remain in its place! Heaven forbid if a picture frame hangs slightly more to the left or the rug is askew. My husband is a tornado of destruction. From massacres in the toilet to crime scenes in the sink, mess seems to follow him wherever he goes.
In fact, he seems to have a laundry pile sprouting from his backside with every step taken. You open a drawer, you close it again. You open the door…you get my drift! There goes my head again, along with my tolerance for the closed-door phobic! Some people are naturally tidy; books alphabetized by author, for example. Clothes not only neatly folded but colour-coded, too.
Dishes and glassware carefully arranged by size — All common traits of a tidy person.
Are you a chalk and cheese couple? - Times of India
And likewise, when a messy person meets an equally as messy person. Surely this is a recipe for disaster? Neatness and messiness are not generally issues of right and wrong, they are matters of personal preferences and tendencies. People who tend to lean towards tidiness generally function in this way: When their space is cluttered, their minds feel cluttered.
The only way to resolve looming issues — apart from relentless nagging — is to learn to bend and adjust to a different style of living. Compromise is the key to keeping your relationship afloat; you will simply have to learn how to communicate your needs with one another and make any necessary sacrifices along the way. Unfortunately, he is sadly mistaken. He is male, after all.
Know Your English - What is the meaning of 'Chalk and cheese' - The Hindu
I mean, does it really matter if your partner is terrible at timekeeping or, on the contrary, insists that everything is alphabetized? According to psychologists, we naturally gravitate towards individuals who have strengths which we are missing. Our natural attraction to our opposite is thought to be, a subconscious way of dealing with the weaker aspects of our own nature, and, therefore all the traits we need to work on in ourselves tend to be reflected to us through our partner.
You might learn something! Whilst my husband likes guns, gangsters and more guns.
Know Your English - What is the meaning of 'Chalk and cheese'
Oh, and not forgetting zombies, aliens and robots, I enjoy something a little more light-hearted. Of course, it can work! Not only would it become incredibly tedious if you both liked the same stuff, but it could also prevent you from exploring new things.
A relationship with your polar opposite will guarantee both. It takes a real connection to develop something deeper. You and your partner might not have everything in common when it comes to media tastes or hobbies, but who cares? Even our sex drives are conflicting. Like many couples, in the prime of our relationship, we were at it like rampant rabbits. As the years drifted by, sex slipped down the hierarchy of needs and pitched itself below food, sleep and …errr…. This can prove quite problematic when I have one frisky husband who would do anything I mean, anything!
The novelty and excitement of a new relationship can often mask sex drive imbalances. Sex should be fun, exciting and most importantly, enjoyable. Not something we schedule into our busy diaries or avoid at all costs. When one person desires sex more than the other it can cause tension and resentment on both sides. As with time, differences might crop up. Petty squabbles followed by verbal volleys will put you at loggerheads with your mate. Says psychologist, Chandni Mehta, "When you are not happy in a relationship even a small thing can trigger off an unhappy response from you.
We’re as different as chalk and cheese and here’s what our 20 years of marriage looks like
Your partner's small habits might start irritating you. And now when you meet each other it is more of an obligation than your heart desiring to meet each other, A strong sign that you are not with the right person.
Different people have different upbringing and lifestyle. For two individuals to click, there has to be a match between their basic standard of living. Dr Anjali Chhabria believes that initially two people are attracted to each other's personality.
The key is to understand each other's values and ideologies. There have been cases where one person is an early riser and the other person has never seen the sun-rise!
It is truly said that the grass is always greener on the other side. Well if that is what you are thinking about your relationship then you ought to do a reality check. You only fancy another person when the current person you are with, has some short comings.